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Post Info TOPIC: How has Marin changed philosophically and demographically?


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Reply To: How has Marin changed philosophically and demographically? (from original forum)
  
 


I was born and raised in Marin County, moved away for a while but returned. As I am fortunate enough to live in an affluent part of the county my neighbors drive the dreaded SUVs but we also have the socially redeeming Priuses. Do we know the people in our neighborhood - yes. Are they our BFFs - no. Can we ask some to lend a hand - pick up papers, bring in mail etc. - yes.

So many in this thread have commented about the horrible vehicles people choose to drive, how nasty and rude people are and how people spend so much time ripping others. I ask them, what is it you are doing in this thread if not ripping your neighbors.

There is a story about an old man sitting by the side of the road leading up to a city. A traveler stopped and asked the old man what the people were like in the city. The old man asked a question - "What were the people like in your home city?" The traveler replied "They were rude, clannish, selfish and mean" The old man said " You will find the people here like that"

A little later another traveler stopped and asked the old man what the people were like in the city. The old man asked the question of this traveler - "What were the people like in your home city?" The traveler replied "They were pleasant, polite, and welcoming" The old man said " You will find the people here like that"

I hate to sound to "touchy feely" but maybe you get what you give. Try to be kind to those lesser beings about you. After all noblesse oblige.

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I was very moved by the Dumpster in East Corte Madera story by Marinative, that really sums it up for me. I grew up in Kent Woodlands, and even back then you were very fortunate to buy a house up there- but now you have to be a zillionare. I think we were upper middle class at that time, lot of lawyers and doctors. Nevertheless us kids new everyone on the streets just about. We carpooled to school and went over to other kids houses all the time. You would wave to about five times to people you knew as you drove down the street, and recognize all of the cars. Families would have easter egg hunts at certain homes etc. Now, most of these people don't talk to or know their next door neighbor. They all sit in there big monster houses and watch their home theater screens. It's sad, as I still go up there to visit my parents who are part of a very small group of people who still live there. All I see are kids in fenced yards playing by themselves. All the riches that they have, they live in and have created a community with no culture.

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So sad, yet true, thse comments I've been reading about the Marin of today. Sure, there are a lot of really interesting, well educated, forward thinking types in the county these days, but the feeling of "entitlement" among some of our more wealthy, and might I say more recent arrivals, is really sometimes revolting to have to put up with. I was over at the Village the other day for some reason, and I sat down to have a bowl of soup at some little spot over there and ended up listening to these three really obnoxious women in their 30s. Their "chit-chat" was full of banal, petty things, as they spent most of the time "ripping" one of their so called "friends" for her behavior toward them, or talking about what they had just bought at the store. Then they ended up talking about their Mercedes, and their time spent at the spa and the gym. I wondered where these women came from? I guess they were "trophy wives," but my thought was,
"why would any sane man put up with such nonsense!?" On top of that, they spent almost no time supervising several smaller kids, who were running amok and bothering other customers with constant screaming and whining. Finally, one woman sitting across the way went over and literally read them the riot act for not watching out for their kids. I guess they weren't used to taking care of them, as they all probably had Nannies to do the job most of the time. I've never understood the whole "nanny" business anyway. If you're going to have kids, raise them yourself for crying out loud, don't have some other person raise them, unless you have to be at work all the time! I don't think any of these women had worked a day in their lives, and they certainly had the time to watch out for their little ones. That's one of the reasons some kids don't turn out so well! One of the reasons my wife and I love living in Fairfax is that you don't run into too many of these kinds of people. Even the richer folks who have been moving over here in greater numbers in recent years, seem for the most part, pretty down to earth. You wouldn't want to live in a funky, artsy-craftsy town like Fairfax if you needed to impress your friends by taking them to overpriced "chi-chi" or "tony" little shops that seem to be appearing more and more throughout the county, because those kind of places don't seem to exist here in this part of Marin, (thank god!) But I do despair when I see some of the obnoxious, noveau rich who have brought their spoiled attitudes with them to the county and made other people sometimes feel uncomfortable. I saw I guy a few years ago driving a beamer down 101 near Tiburon, and his bumper sticker read: "He who dies with the most toys at the end of the game wins!" That's the kind of selfish, obnoxious person that unfortunately is all too frequently popping up in our county more and more these days. These folks are also the kind of people who that new slick Marin magazine seems catered to. They've got more money than they know what to do with, so a whole bunch of cottage industries have been created to cater to their needs. Everyone has a right to make as much money as they want, but I will just say this: just don't throw your vanity or your entitlement issues in the rest of our faces, please! Anyway, as a longtime and native Marinite, I just hate to see Marin becoming more and more exclusive. But that's the way of our world lately, and I feel for the young people who will be shut out of an opportunity to live in this beautiful place because a "cottage" in Corte Madera costs 800 grand to buy! I guess that's why so many people have moved north to Sonoma County and beyond because they simply can't afford to live here anymore! That's a shame!

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Bruce Macgowan


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I couldn't agree more, the new comers and their sense of self entitlement is disgusting! I try to explain to my friends who aren't from here how it "used to be" before all the rich idiots moved in with all the money and goddamn SUV's! Neighbors did care, hell we had block parties! Times have changed and so has the population and quality of people now living in Marin. Sad to see that happen but I guess I can say I feel fortunate to have experienced the way it was.

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I agree with Paula, there are many rude people around Marin now and it does really show by their driving habits. I could go on and on about how some people move up to a big house on a very small road built 100 years ago. They buy the biggest truck possible, a Cadallac Escalade or Ford Expidition, drive it up and down the hill for a year and then figure out that the truck is to big for the area. The main problem is they are sitting so high they can't possibly see what is going on, I meet them on blind turns and they are in the middle of the road, so I am forced to Stop and wait for them to back up and reposition their vehicles so opposing traffic can safely pass. Unfortunately some of these newcommers don't have much sense of where they are, and I have seen them Stop and refuse to get over on their side of the road, requiring others to back up long distances to accomidate their ignorant selves.
Luckily these are tight little roads up in the hills where vehicles can't possibly get up to a high speed, I have lived up here for 27 years and have never been involved in an accident, but I still keep a piece of kiel (lumber crayon) in each vehicle in case someone hits me, I would immediately jump out of the car and mark all the tires of both vehicles and call the police.
Down in town and out on the freeways it's a completely different world, and if you look at the news, there very rude, mean and deadly drivers all over the state. Marin is nothing compared to the shootings and road rage that goes on every day in the greater bay area, people get killed almost every day due to traffic altercations, and Marin is basically immune from all that. The worst thing I have heard about was a Sonoma commuter northbound in Novato road raged and ran another motorist off of 101 and killed him, they were both from Sonoma but the accident happened in the extreme northern end of Marin. I guess the rest of the world has idiots too, even more than Marin does. It's actually not that bad here at all.

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I have to agree with you. Rude, obnoxious, greedy, and a sense of entitlement that knows no bounds. You can almost tell just by driving around and observing the way people drive. My parents are still alive but they defected to Healdsburg (which by the way, is getting a little Mariney). All their friends are starting to die and I'm almost grateful that a lot of them don't have to see what's happening to their beautiful Marin. Growing up in Fairfax in the 60's was an idyllic time - slow, quiet, gracious. And it rained a lot - we were always grateful for that!

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Paula


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And none of this has happened overnight. Recently, I was scanning through some Independent-Journal microfilms at the Civic Center Library, starting with 1960 (trying to track down the date of a fire in downtown Larkspur - so far, no luck). One interesting front-page article I stumbled across concerned a report from the Marin labor council commenting on the disturbing downward trend of union members living - or being able to afford to live - in the county. I forget the figures, but the conclusion was that if the trend continued, middle-class working folk would soon be finding it impossible to do so. Well, we all know how that turned out, looking back from 47 years later.

Blackie made a point that's occurred to me often while reading this and other "how has Marin changed?" threads. It isn't just that Marin has changed, but that the whole world has - the way of life that those of us growing up in small-towns in the 50s knew is pretty much gone. Certainly the specific circumstances of Marin makes the change more dramatic - a desirable place to live, finite area in which to do so, consequently supply-and-demand pressures make it more expensive - but there's no denying that things just don't work the way they used to, period.

Of course, there's wiggle room here - as has been pointed out, some places haven't changed as dramatically. Nicasio, for example, today still looks closer to its 50s incarnation than most of central Marin does to its. But that's largely the physical aspect, not so much the social or cultural. Take Larkspur - cut down the trees, and downtown still looks remarkably unchanged. But in all other aspects, the town is totally different from the one I grew up in.

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Paul Obama -

I disagree with your take on Novato. It's pretty slow growth there, the same as the rest of Marin.
You can't build on the ridges, anymore. There is still a lot of open space.
There is actually more diversity there than some other parts of Marin, with some almost "affordable housing".
Novato has a lot of interesting people, like ex-military from Hamilton, SF police and fireman, and even a few cowboys from the western weekend days. And for you old-timey hippies, Olompali was the Grateful Dead's hang-out back in the day. A lot of musicians have made Novato their home, like Greg Allman, Steve Miller and assorted blues players. Mikes Music downtown is a mini Village Music. And remember the great Marshall J?
Most of the changes that people talk about on this thread apply to the whole country, and even world. Our generation (boomers) decided not to have kids, or just to have a couple at most. Other people from other countries are looking for jobs and opportunity, and there is plenty of that here, because people that were here before us set up a great system and country. Some of the new come legally and many illegally and we need to figure out how to deal with that. But if you think these new people don't impact the culture and everything else (traffic, schools, etc) then you are living with your head in Stinson sand.
The changes aren't due to evil "rich people". They were here back in '62 and before. If they want to make Marin their home, more power to them. And I'm sure some of your high school associates got rich right here, so they are old-time Marin, too. And who is more xenophobic, provincial and snobby than Bolinas types that tear down road signs?
Viva San Rafael!

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Marin is very diverse with it's little areas all with cheifs, inspectors, captains and directors for very small areas, and each juristiction does things differently. Now we have areas in the north (Novato) that were never even really considered as Marin in the old days, they allow rampant tracts, condos and congestion while relying on Sonoma for water, and they have to ration as they continue to approve more developement every day. That is not the Marin I know, it is much more like Sonoma County.
West Marin is still pretty much unspoiled and is the same as when I grew up there in the 60's.
Southern Marin is still beautiful as ever but has been built out down in the flats, so I don't spend much time down in places that I don't like, there are still wonderful areas up in the higher elevations that will never be destryed. In Mill Valley they want to add a bunch of condo/apartments down in the business district. I feel sorry for anyone who would get duped into living down there, but I can easily avoid looking at it by not driving down Miller Ave., the same with the freeway, I say let the Sonoma commuters have at it, I don't need it.
I personally know and have worked on most every house on my street for the last 27 years.It must be much different down the hill but up here, it is a great, quiet, peaceful, healthy and perfect place to live, even though they are now building 2 new houses on the street, we have only allowed 5 in the last 27 years. I really can't complain.

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This is a really sad post. Does everyone who still lives in Marin agree with this? Has the concept of being a "good neighbor" really died in Marin? Please sound off if you feel your current Marin neighborhood still has a strong sense of community like "the good ol' days". Some examples would be great.

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Here's a story that illustrates what Corte Madera has become. My mom lived in East Corte Madera for 40 years. She fell and hurt herself at home and so I recently had to move her to an assisted living facility. I hadn't spent any serious time back in her old neighborhood for many many years. But, in order to clean out her place l, I had the misfortune of having to spend alot of time there this past spring and summer.

I say 'misfortune" because the change in the neighborhood was very distressing. The neighbors living around mom's house are all from the New Marin School of Thought. Otherwise known as me, myself and I. Here's why:

I needed to rent a dumpster to deal with some of mom's stuff. Well, guess what? That's right. Mom's newcomer neighbors, most of whom had spent in the low 1 millions for the surrounding homes, would sneak over under cover of darkness and throw their garbage and construction waste, old carpeting etc in my dumpster.

Here was my mom, an elderly woman living there, it was obvious that there were changes going on in her house and it was obvious she had been in that neighborhood a very long time. Obviously, if these people hadn't had their heads you know where, they would have noticed that possibly something had happened to her. Sometimes one of them would come by while I was working there, but only to try to pry into my intentions for mom's house. --was I selling and how much for? You see, for the new Marin resident, property is never about people, the humans living their lives inside. Naw, it's all about M_0_N_E_Y and making more of it. Yeah, in the olden days, neighbors might have stopped by with a home cooked meal for me, or they'd inquire about my mother, maybe offer to send her a get well card etc...Not these new neighbors. And so dumb these people were --or so cavalier--not sure which--they would go ahead and leave their junk mail in the garbage they were dumping with their full names and house numbers --so I could see exactly which neighbors were responsible.

Translation: I could care less about what has happened to this old woman who has lived in this neighborhood for so long. FREE DUMPSTER SPACE! Yes ! now I can spend more money on my granite, my Toto toilets, my faux paint jobs and my new Mercedes SUV that never leaves the paved road.

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MarinNative


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The one common thread i see in all these replies is the natives, people here 30-40-50 years aren't very happy with the snooty, rude, obnoxious, spoiled, greedy, what else am I leaving out people who have invaded our once quite, friendly, peaceful, neighborhoods. The show of wealth is disgusting. Look at our hillsides, you can"t miss these huge gaudey displays of wealth, "My mounument is bigger then yours!" I can't stand the way Marin is now but these jerks will not drive me out, I will stay here with the rest of the native Marinites and remember how it used to be.

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Anonymous

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I think Marin has really changed both philosophically and demographically. Families have really changed. In the 60's the average size of the young families was probaby 4-5 kids. I was one of 7 and right around the corner was a family of 11. Today, most families have from one or two kids. Three kids is not unusual but since most Moms work nowadays.. more than that seems nearly impossible.

Almost everyone had two parents living with them. The Moms seemed always to be home when the kids got home from school and Dad was working hard to provide for those big families.

Less families attend religious services today than in the 60's. Growing up the churches were always full... today they are full on Christmas and Easter.

There's a lot more money in Marin these days than when I was a kid. I'm not quite sure the kids today are as happy-go-lucky as when I was a kid. I loved growing up in marin.



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Oh baby, is it a loaded question. I concur with all the posts. Same for me: box sliding, minimal crime, drive ins etc. Always something to do. People really were more friendly as well. 4th street? Maybe a couple of bums but not endless junkies and thugs like there is now around 2nd and B. The canal? Yeah, it was always a little shady, now it's down right dangerous. I went to Kragen at Marin Square the other day and was litterally mobbed by day laborers. Granted, I own a truck, but GEEZUS!

Speaking of which, in 1978 I got a ticket for loitering hanging out in Larkspur at that little bridge on Bon Air by the hospital. My friend was late and a cop drove by and saw me still hanging out within a 1/2 hour of cruising by. Anyway, the point is: LOITERING?! What are you kidding? Try going down Anderson or the aforementioned 2/B. I live on Picnic Hill so I drive to 101 from Anderson every day. There were dudes hanging out down there CHRISTMAS DAY!! Are you serious? That's the saddest thing that I've seen in my beloved county.

The rich a******s? Yeah, I guess. The Dominican area @ Mountain View Ave. as well as Belvedere and even Peacock Gap I always remember as being a little more "upper crusty". But I concur with the attitude change. Hell, who could blame any of us. Traffic sux! I drive all over the county for a living and it's getting worse month to month. Cell phones, laptops, even latino au pairs driving overly cautious while driving their charges in their employers minivans, or just stressed out soccer moms. (pardon the dated reference)

To end on a high note, I'm not leaving. I've been here all my life and unless we decide to retire in Scotsdale, AZ some day, I'm not leaving. It's MY home. It's OUR home.


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cat


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Funny, as a kid, my brother and I had friends who lived in East Corte Madera, (even in the house I live in now!), and I was kind of envious of them. I lived on a hill in Larkspur with no sidewalks, so I wasn't allowed to play out on the street. My friends over in ECM could run around the streets all day, and it was FLAT!

Blue collar? Yup, I hear what you're saying. My father was a water meter repairman, and my mom did part time real estate. Everyone we knew were either in retail, retired military, auto mechanics, small, local business owners, etc.
and were homeowners. We didn't have pool people, or housecleaners, or gardeners. The kids pulled weeds and cleaned the pool and did many of the household chores. Imagine that!!

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I am one individual who has become discouraged by the changes in Marin. I grew up on the East Side of Corte Madera, in Marin Estates, and had the best memories of living there. The neighborhood was close knit, we were KIDS, played until we could play no more, and there was never a problem of being bored. But, we still had the stigma of being on the "other side of the tracks", according to those who lived on the West side. Thus, many of us who were on the East side called our area the stucco slums (based on all the tract housing). We were all working class families. There wasn't the issue of extreme wealth. Everyone was in the same boat, and there was never the problem of having to keep up with the Jones'.
Once the Village was built in 1982-83 ish, that is what put Corte Madera on the map. It started to change and I couldn't understand why everyone was so ga-ga over this mall. I personally find all the malls in Marin very boring and cookie cutter. Nothing unusual or different. They were so much better in the 70's!
So, I'm more inclined to say that being a native of Marin, I'm sad that it's become all about wealth and materialism. The beauty of Marin's landscape hasn't changed....only the population that now resides. But I'm so glad to hear of other Marinite's sharing their memories and photos with the rest of us!


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Anonymous

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Anonymous wrote:



I don't think kids growing up here now will say that when they are "our" age..know why? Because they don't have drive-in movie theaters, good burger joints, they don't slide down hills on cardboard or play hide-and-seek on warm summer nights, they don't play ball in the street (probably get run over now), or climb trees - they are all stuffed in their rooms doing hours and hours of homework OR glued to their video games and computers OR hanging on the street corners being "bored".





I hear what you're saying however it is all relative. I grew up in Marin during the 80s, so we were lacking drive-ins, soda fountains, and all the other good stuff your generation had. I vividly recall people saying the same thing about my group of classmates - that our video games and TV were keeping us from experiencing a real childhood, but in i have such wonderful memories of growing up here.

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Anonymous

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Another thought on this topic related to how things have changed...this site is bringing up so many great memories of some really fun times! It does sound so trivial though when you say "Ah those were the good old days and things have changed so much" but actually, they WERE the good old days.

I don't think kids growing up here now will say that when they are "our" age..know why? Because they don't have drive-in movie theaters, good burger joints, they don't slide down hills on cardboard or play hide-and-seek on warm summer nights, they don't play ball in the street (probably get run over now), or climb trees - they are all stuffed in their rooms doing hours and hours of homework OR glued to their video games and computers OR hanging on the street corners being "bored".

I never remember being bored. I remember playing so hard after school that we almost fell sleep during dinner and then maybe we had an hour of homework and we had chores to do, too. I remember falling into bed at 9pm thinking to myself "I can't wait to go to school tomorrow then go outside and play with my friends!" You just want to scream to kids these days: "Get outside and visit friends and play ball and find a big piece of old cardboard and slide down that dry grassy hill! Get out of your books and your rooms and your computers and be a kid and experience life!" That generation is going to grow up so disconnected with their childhood life in Marin that they won't even know what has changed or what has stayed the same.



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Anonymous

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It's totally changed. I grew up here in San Rafael. I am tired of the snobby adult attitudes, the bratty and entitled Marin kids and teenagers (we were never like that when we grew up - there was respect built into our daily lives at home and at school). I just don't get how this all happened and it's so sad.

I still love a lot of things about Marin but it's not like it used to be. Too much traffic, congestion, higher downtown structures in San Rafael replacing older businesses. Small town feel is pretty much gone. Despite what people say, it's not the most beautiful place on earth either. I sort of get tired of hearing people say "we live in the most beautiful place on earth and we are so privledged, wealthy and educated". Makes me crazy when I hear that or read that in the paper. A beautiful place on earth is anywhere you make it. Go to any other town in the US and most likely the people will say "I live in the most beautiful place in the U.S.". My friends in North Carolina think they live in the most beautiful place and so do my friends in Boston, Maryland, Seattle, Denver, Florida, Virginia and Michigan.

It's all how you look at things but people in Marin are so caught up in something that I don't get and I am frustrated trying to figure out how this place got so snobby. I went away to college and came back 10 years later and it was totally changed. That was between 1975 and 1985. I don't like dwelling on the past but it sure was a lot more fun back in the 60's and 70's here. I have visited other towns in the U.S. that have that old small town (but not hick) feel and attitude so somewhere along the way, Marin got a good dose of snobbery and it's too bad.

So you may ask why I am still stuck here. We are making our way out soon to the foothills of California to buy some land near Nevada City. Closer to what I think is the most beautiful place - Lake Tahoe. Marin doesn't even come close to the beauty and atmosphere of the high country, the Sierra Nevada and Lake Tahoe itself - just a few breaths of that mountain air put you in a different mental space. Plus less taxes, less house payment, less traffic and some peace and quiet for a change.

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Anonymous

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Definitely a loaded question! I should be careful....

Yes, I often feel a disconnect. I started feeling it when we bought our first house in Mariner's Cove, CM in 1995 (before the market went crazy, or we never could have afforded it). I was talking to a nearby neighbor, who had recently moved in, and she was trash-talking the neighbors who had concrete or gravel front yards, rather than landscaped. I tried to explain that these were original owners who went throught the drought during the mid-'70's, but she didn't want to hear it. The yards weren't pretty enough.

Another thing that got to me was when an artist painted the underpass in San Rafael (at 3rd, I think?) with blue paint and flowers, and people complained that it was gaudy and tacky and didn't fit in with the cities "image". Excuse me? the image?? Caltrans then conveniantly found that they needed to do guardrail work at that exact location, which took away about half of the artwork.

Dare I even talk about Mill Valley? No, I would get too snarky...




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Anonymous

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I think Marin back in the 60's and 70's had more working class people, you know, folks who drove trucks for a living, were teachers, grew up in The City and moved her to raise families, etc. Now, the population seems made up much more of folks with high-paying professions and lots of people from the East Coast.

One thing I find in common with "newcomers", as you say, is that they seem to love Marin as much as I do and as much as we did growing up. I do find a special bond with others who have grown up here, though they are few and far between!

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Anonymous

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This is a loaded question. As folks who grew up in Marin, some of whom still live in Marin, how have the people who live in Marin and the lifestyle in Marin changed since you lived here growing up? If you still live here, do you feel a bit disconnected sometimes from "new-comers" ?



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